This being a holiday week I took the trash out one day later than I normally would. For as long as I can remember this has been the appropriate thing to do during a holiday week. This of course raises the obvious question of "how does my garbage man benefit from a holiday?".
Let's call my garbage man Tom. Tom enjoyed his Memorial Day holiday watching the Cub game on TV. On Tuesday, Tom picks up all of the garbage he would have otherwise picked up on Monday. On Wednesday, he picks up Tuesday's trash and so on through the week. So what happens at the end of the week? Does Tom pick up Friday's trash on Saturday? Would Saturday normally be a day off? If so, why not work on the holiday so Tom can enjoy his usual day off on Saturday?
Does anyone have trash day on Friday? Maybe Friday people just don't get their trash picked up at all during a holiday week. Or maybe they add a few extra houses at the end of the day each day to make up for the lost productivity at the beginning of the week. But who are those people that get added at the end of the day? And how does a customer know he's one of the "late in the same day" customers versus a "next day" customer?
Tomorrow's topic: Do I really over-analyze things?
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79 comments:
I see your dilemma. I actually think about the postperson (mailman to you politically incorrect slugs), and how she must be in the same situation. Let's call her Mark.
Although she normally has most federal holidays off, she's probably teetering on the edge attending a therapy session on those days. Think about it, she has to come back to work and find out that the volume of mail is still there and very likely has increased. Thanks alot for the break!
On top of that, poor Mark has to work on Saturday's and busily sort mail only to find out that she occasionally makes an innocent mistake and finds out that someone on her route has called her boss to complain that his mail is late or she delivered a letter to the wrong address. Now her boss chews out her butt, and after a long tirade, guess what she has to do? Yep, catch up with the mail!
It's a wonder that we don't have more postal workers going . . .well, postal! We definitely need to stamp this out! Oh well, carry on.
On the one hand you have the garbage man and the postal worker. On the other hand you have the upper management type. Say, for example, a director of some process at a huge insurance company. We'll call him Dick.
Dick has it made. He spends his day on the phone and writing e-mails while his blindly loyal minions do his bidding. What's worse, Dick even diminishes the workers' productivity by calling meetings on a moment's notice for his own amusement just because he can - proceeding to use the otherwise valuable time to brush up on some lame standup comedy routine.
Thank goodness we're no Tom, Dick or Harry!
Ok. Now lets assume for sake of argument that there's an engineer whom we'll just call Weiler. He spends all day badgering his minions while disguising it as productivity. Instead, he's deathly trying to obtain the approval of his boss, but his boss is too busy having wine with one of Weiler's associates. While Weiler's picking on a company vendor for his own perverse amusement, his boss is russelling around the country on his own personal jet. Another episode of Melrose Place. . . I think not. Just trying to leave my mysterious mark on this blog. . .
To be continued. . .(Insert evil laugh)
Picture this then, it could be in any state, on a farm. This guy (we'll call him Mr. Gramigna) is making soy sauce and the soy bean plants are in bloom - by the ton.
Mr. Gramigna has this unique method of harvesting the soy bean plants. Instead of using the traditional combine, he has this long whip like object that he spins around like a weed eater.
The neighbors watch this freakish behavior in horror. Why did they ever leave the comfort of suburbia?
I'm starting to get it. Is that something like. . .say a Mr. Miller were to get so upset that he axes his Acura Legend in a fit of rage over being fired? or am I just bobbing for a laugh?
I donna sports fan. Sims to me you know norton. But Mr. Gramigna was a squatter all right.
I may be a little hard to understand, I need to see a dennis.
I see, I see, Eisle. Ann now what do you do for an encore? Get a royota? I think you're grasping for strahls. I think you need to harness your energy, jack.
Friday is my regular trash pick up day and on a holiday the trash is picked up on Saturday. I would feel bad for the trash man except he is making about $100 an hour to pick up my trash on a weekend and if he doesn't want to do it they have casual staff who will do it for a measly $75 an hour or something like that. Don't ask why I know this.
Ok. So WHY do you know this?
Wouldn't the more appropriate question be HOW does he know this?
I originally had put HOW into the question, but realized that he put WHY in his original post, so to be consistent, I opted to follow the poster's lead which is the essence of true communication. So there, nimrod-o-dufus-espyalladouchehead.
Sorry to offend Mary Poppins but I was actually tweaking the anonymous guy because, as you so eloquently point out in your last comment, he put WHY in his original post.
Good thing you're not sensitive.
Sorry I missed your point, ash wipe.
Go fly a kite.
Chiminey cricket. I think you need your clock cleaned!
When I'm threw with you, your face will be so scarred you'll have to grow a van dyke, dick.
Andrew will Julie pay for that bad joke.
You're right, I'm folding like an umbrella.
Bert you a dollar that you're wrong! Nah Nah Nah Nan ny.
You may get a Ed but you can't Wynn!
I see your Ed Wynn with a Fred Gwynne, you little munster. Perhaps, I should switch to Fred Lynn, but he's a little self centered.
Did Fred Lynn got to Rice? I should have asked yesterday when I saw him in the Jim.
I think you're Dwight. Evans you can get one correct occasionally. That fad diet must be working correctly as you are Bernie-ing those Carbos! Yaz!!!
That's right sports fan, I'm big and Burle, son.
I feel like we're getting Bogged down as we Wade through these many posts. I know you're jealous of my wit because I can see that Little Green Monster called envy creeping out from behind you.
Jealous? Excuse me while I flip you the boyd. For all the work I do holding up your end of the blog, I ought to send you a Bill, by golLee. You are in space, man!
Were you in St. Luis having a Tiant party? Just thought I would Sparky your imagination knowing full well you were just in Lyle, Illinois.
I was in Windsor and I'm not going to pudge from my story. We drove there, by the way, because I didn't want anyone to fisk me at the airport.
Did you catch anything while you were out of town? I may be in error but I thought your wife stayed home? Perhaps, you were trying to get to first base with the office floozie?
Wait a second, don't make me get short with you. My wife did go with me and even if she didn't I wouldn't be out trying to cop a field from some floozie.
Well, I may have been in left field, but you don't have to give me the third degree! Stop your pitching! I was just trying to make sure you had your rubber just in case. . .it rains. Comforting to know when you're rosin in the morning with an old bag. I was just o-pine-ing and didn't think I was going to be tarred and feathered!
By George you Bretter get your facts straight from now on. I don't want to have to tell you aken! You know, you're a Royal pain in the ass.
Wil - Son, you're really no Angel. Willie just leave me alone. I know this is a really Rockies relationship, but you're really Preston the wrong buttons - why don't you Go mez with someone else!
I'm sorry but I'm apauled with this. I have to split or(f) and go work in my gardan - I'm growing some Quisenberry bushes.
Hey, don't Fred about leaving, I need to get some liver Patek myself or maybe some Famous Amos cookies. Otis post is really driving me crazy!
Sorry to take so long in responding. I was on the John. Then I got caught up watching reruns of Mayberry RFD. After this I'm going to spend a buck and drop off my clothes at One Hour Martinezing.
Al have you know that you're a yellow bellied Cowens! Must be in your Genes, you long haired freak - Get to a Garber!
Frankly I don't think you're white. All whitey then, have you heard from echo, maybe you should comment on her zog - I mean blog.
Dan! I should have had my Quisenberry cereal for breakfast instead of the V8! Guess, I'm Porter off than a Darrellict!
You're quite a card. I've heard Missouri loves company. Too bad you're not much of a wizard at puns, but oz pretty good.
Great Scott! I think you're Rolen now. Just when I thought you were Ted. Guess you were just sleeping in that new Simmons mattress really helps your thinking. All these puns are making me hungry: I'm a-Ken for a Reitz-s peanut butter cup.
Did I tell you my wife went to Orlando? I think Cepeda for the airline ticket. I tried to complain but her response was rather curt. I just wanted to avoid a flood of expenses.
Roger that. Your Maris must be crumbling - consider therapy, you Louser or at least bring her some Brock's candy. Timiney cricket! Don't you remember when you McCarver her name in that tree when you were still dating? Of course, you were alot more Gib then Son, but guess you were still bobbing for complements.
Lately we've been Dallying in too many things and are credit cards are in Maxvill. I've taken a second job at a karaoke bar. Last night I was behind the Mike singing Shannon. Then I was in an eating contest against some guy named Julian; however, he won because he was a lot Javier than I was.
Boyer boy, you sure Ken come up with some quick ones. I can barely Stan up since I'm so a-Musial with your jokes.
I guess my jokes have made you Dizzy. Looks like I'm the Dean of puns. I think that's just Ducky. You better not Med wick me!
Enos something? I'm really Slaughter'n you in puns!
I think someone should put you in a full nelson but then I'm all brile(s)ed up!
I'm aMize that you are so clever especially for someone who spends the majority of his time in the Johnny
That was lame - you're not using your 'Ed! I think you're a little Spiezi, O nevermind!
Frankie speaking, I Frisch out of retorts.
Looks like I've got you over a darrell; shall I call a porter to help you out of town?
Call him a taxi, a porter costs morr. Is there luggage involved? You'd better bring a matt to cover 'em, you don't know where those taxis have been.
I can't even get a Carpenter in this town for Chris' sakes!
You sound stressed. Watch a scary movie, that'll loosen you up. How about Jason? Is that ok? Or the ring? hausen Haunted Hill? Are those fine?
Or take a drive. You could ride a motorcycle but you'd better wear 'Ed gear; or you could rent a Kia Ria.
I would like to go to the can, but I heard that Prince Albert is in there. He's been in there awhile, hope he doesn't Pulhols a muscle or anything. Now while I'm waiting, I think I'll go to the Jim, but wait, I need to sell my car, so I'll get on Edmonds.com
I heard that the last time you were at the gym you got behind a Mike and told everyone "Ma theny hurts!"
You'd better keep going to the gym, because if you work hard enough you'll be Ray King in the benefits.
I like working out and then going to get a refreshing Orange Julian, but sometimes I just like getting liquored up at the local Tavares
I'd suggest a refreshing So Ta, and maybe a shopping trip to guchi.
Instead I went to a buffet, and Great Scott! I was so stuffed, I was Rolen out the door.
I think they rolled you out the door because you were bobbing for pot stickers. Do Eue conker?
I'll bet you needed to take a trip to the John after that meal, Mabry even a few trips!
I went to this great new restaurant, Yada, Yada, Yadier - but all they had were high calorie meats, and they certainly could use Molina beef.
Pour some Suppan the meat, I'll bet it'll make it delicious in a Jeffy.
How are the ribs at this place? Are they Matty? I hear the spicy barbecue sauce is Alou lou.
The Marquis out front said the steaks here were the best in town, but the ribeye is so dry, I'm Jason it with water.
The restaurant actually left its Mark on its place or origin. . .Mulder Colorado.
Why don't you leave your Mark by wearing some McGwire rim glasses.
I know we agreed, but what the Hector, I was a little Luna when we made the pact.
I couldn't believe when I Red your comment. You should be aschoened of yourself. Tell me you dienst mean what you wrote!
Listen you don't know Jack! I was crazy when I agreed. In fact, I was Clarked by the tropper going 95!
I was stopped by a trooper once. I was wondering, "Willie give me a ticket or let me go because he likes McGee-a?".
I think you're getting deLarryis! Why don't you Walker off?
Maybe I'll go to Frances, by George!
You could go to Waco, Texas where they had the Branch David-ian standoff. Obviously, that cult left a bad Eckstein on the town.
I guess I'm just trying to eVada Pin, son.
You deserve a Tony for that acting, but I think I should Pena-lize you for responding so late. What were you doing - working on your next little trick or LaRussa?
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