We have an all butter pound cake in our refrigerator. A Sara Lee product. But I have 2 problems with our all butter pound cake. First of all, it's not all butter. If it were all butter it would be exactly that, butter. And then the modifier "all butter" would be useless because what's the point of labeling butter as "all butter butter"?
My next issue is the pound part. Our cake weighs 10.75 ounces. Sounds to me like we were ripped off for 5.25 ounces of cake. Or was it butter that we were shorted? I can say this for certain, if I wanted to butter my toast in the morning with my "all butter" product, I'm about one pound short of being able to do it.
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
Thursday, September 15, 2005
The New Five Blade Gillette Razor
I'm so embarassed. I actually bought into that two blades is better than one thing - but I figured that two blades was the absolute peak of shaving requirements. But then came three blades. And four blades. And now somehow we actually need five blades to shave?!
I suppose at some point there must be a limit. At a maximum I figure the number of blades should not have a combined height that exceeds the length of shavable inches on the average face. I think that would make about 50 blades.
Then there is the weight consideration. Once the razor exceeds a certain number of ounces I would assume one's dexterity would begin to diminish. There has to be a point where the benefit of extra blades is offset by the loss of agility as one struggles to move this behemoth across one's face.
And what exactly is the benefit of all those extra blades? The twin blade supposedly used the lead blade to pull a hair a little further out of the face while the second blade chopped the sucker off. Are we now to assume that the first four blades each pull that hair ever further out of the face just before number five comes along to finish the dirty deed? At some point I fear a vital organ might come peaking out with all those objects tugging on my face. God forbid that I shave one of those right off of me. That would take some kind of after shave to soothe that razor burn!
I suppose at some point there must be a limit. At a maximum I figure the number of blades should not have a combined height that exceeds the length of shavable inches on the average face. I think that would make about 50 blades.
Then there is the weight consideration. Once the razor exceeds a certain number of ounces I would assume one's dexterity would begin to diminish. There has to be a point where the benefit of extra blades is offset by the loss of agility as one struggles to move this behemoth across one's face.
And what exactly is the benefit of all those extra blades? The twin blade supposedly used the lead blade to pull a hair a little further out of the face while the second blade chopped the sucker off. Are we now to assume that the first four blades each pull that hair ever further out of the face just before number five comes along to finish the dirty deed? At some point I fear a vital organ might come peaking out with all those objects tugging on my face. God forbid that I shave one of those right off of me. That would take some kind of after shave to soothe that razor burn!
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