Shacking Up

And how exactly should we refer to a person's co-habitant without the formality of marriage? Somehow the use of "live-in" in my last post seemed somewhat vague. Using the term "live-in lover" seems a little over-the-top and frankly paints a picture I don't want to look at. And once people are in their 50's, "boyfriend" and "girlfriend" should no longer apply. Ladyfriend? Manfriend? I'm afraid they're simply dating. Husband and wife are clearly incorrect because these people have made a conscious decision to not be exactly that.

Oh well, I'll just ask my roomie.

Show Me the Money!

I work with someone who tells me that their "live-in" is an excellent investor. Mind you, these people have received a few million dollars (outside of investing) in recent years - I think that may have gone a long way toward this "excellent" investing track record.

I'm always rather skeptical of people who brag of their own success or the success of those near and dear. However, as I contemplated my own investment skills, I came to a conclusion. I'm an excellent borrower!

I may not invest much but I sure can bring it in! Well, there is that minor catch of having to give it back some day but for now I'm a regular debt magnet. Mortgage? Got it. Line of credit? All over it. Car loans? You know it! And credit cards? I think there is a forest in Washington designated for the exclusive use of sending me pre-approved credit card offers.

Oh yeah, don't bother telling me about your financial prowess - I'm right there with Warren Buffet. Well, maybe across from him - with a loan document placed in front of me.

If I Stole the Memorabilia

What you are about to read is entirely hypothetical...

Let's say I'm a famous former professional athlete. And let's further say that certain mementos of my career had fallen into the hands of others - and I wanted them back. How would I go about going to get them back? Hmm.

First I would have to develop a plan. Let's see, as a famous former professional athlete, my face would be familiar to thousands. Perhaps a covert plan would make sense. After all, bursting into a room to confront the scurrilous thieves would be foolish since they would all know who I am.

Next, I guess I would have to assemble a team. Perhaps a gang of gun-toting thugs is in order? No, I think I need more of an intellectual bunch. Someone who could disarm security and sneak around without detection.

I think that should cover it. Yes, if I stole the memorabilia, I think I would organize a gang of gun-toting thugs to shout obscenities and generally bully people around in a crowded hotel room until I get what I want.

But again, this is all strictly hypothetical.